Spring Break Murder Read online

  "So what rules did you put in place?" I asked. This was starting to sound more like a high school clique than a social club for senior citizens. The membership pins were about the only thing that set them apart.

  "Oh, well people who want to join have to put in an application," Louise said. "Once a year we solicit applications and then we host a cocktail hour here at the clubhouse where we can vet the candidates."

  I looked around at the group. There were only seven women here. How many people could they possibly let in every year? For some reason, this club intrigued me.

  "How many people are allowed in each year?" I asked.

  "It depends," Louise said as she had another bite of cake. "Some years, no one is allowed in. Most years we allow one new member. But we want this club to stay exclusive, so we can't just let everyone in."

  She laughed a sort of choked laugh that made it seem like she knew just how unfair this selection process was. Louise stabbed the last bit of cake on her plate and started waving it around as she gestured.

  "I'll let you in on a little secret," she said conspiratorially. I couldn't help but watch the cake, afraid the delicious bite would fall right off her fork. "I was the last member allowed in and I'm not even sure why in the world they selected me. I used to be a dowdy old fuddy-duddy. But they apparently saw some potential in me and took pity on me. I like to think it's because I'm pure of heart."

  She gave another odd laugh before eating the bite of cake off her fork with a little raise of her eyebrows letting me know she trusted me with her secret.

  "Honestly though, I have no clue why they chose me," she said, still talking just above a whisper. I could tell by the way she said it that she wasn't actually looking for any input from me, so I put another big bite of cake in my mouth as I leaned forward to hear her better. "And we haven't let in a new member since, so I have no idea what the criteria actually is. But I know there are several people around here who are not happy about the way business is run by the Dolls."

  My mouth was full of cake, but I managed to bulge my eyes enough to let her know I was surprised. Louise smirked, obviously pleased at how I was receiving the gossip. As the lowest ranking member of the Dolls, I'm sure she never got the pleasure of sharing the juiciest news.

  "Word around the park is that the Poodle Woman herself Cindy Parker and her little underling Hilda Brown have tried to join the Dolls unsuccessfully for years," Louise said. I nodded along, pretending to know who she was talking about. A glance around the deck let me know that no one else was paying attention to us, caught up in their own loud conversations and snack eating.

  "Tell me more," I said. This was almost as good as the trashy magazines I like to read every once in a while and unlike Mandy, I'm okay listening to a little gossip every once in a while.

  "At first, Cindy was okay with not getting in because like I said, they don't really let people in," Louise said. "But when they let me in a few years ago, she was not happy. She actually ripped down the congratulations poster the other Dolls put up for me. After that, Cindy's been on a bit of a manhunt to try and get us kicked out of the park. Thankfully the man who runs the park doesn't care to kick us out because we are good tenants. Cindy is the pain in the patoot."

  Before I could say anything else, Bill stood up and waited for the chatting to die down a bit. Sally and Mandy were the last ones still chatting, both of them eager to wrap up their conversation rather than have to interrupt it. Bill looked on, tapping his foot for comedic effect. Finally, the two ladies stopped talking and turned to face Bill.

  "I'm so sorry to interrupt your conversation," Bill said, a note of sarcasm in his voice and a large smile on his face. "But it is time for Sally and I to take the girls to lunch. Don't worry, we will all be out to bob later before I shut the pool down tonight. See you all there!"

  Bobbing? I shot a glance towards Mandy, but she was back to chatting her mother's ear off. Maybe it was just another word for swimming, since Bill mentioned the pool. I guess I'd find out later.

  "I'll see you later dear," Louise said, her gray hair shaking around her face as she patted my hand. "And just keep that little bit about Cindy to yourself."

  I nodded back at her and assured her I would tell no one about the anger of the Poodle Woman and her underling. As Louise shuffled away with the rest of the ladies, I wondered if that included not telling Mandy. As I pushed myself up out of my chair, I decided I'd wait. I wanted to at least see this Poodle Woman before I shared the juicy news.

  Chapter Three

  After a very exciting lunch at a popular food buffet where I stuffed myself with delicious pizza while Mandy's plate was mounded with the biggest salad I've ever seen, we headed back to the park to go bobbing, whatever that was.

  "Change into your swimsuits girls and I'll get your noodles," Sally said when she reemerged from her bedroom. Sally practically floated out the door, leaving us to dig through our suitcases for our bathing suits.

  "Do you know what in the world bobbing is?" I asked once the door slammed shut.

  "Yes, I do," Mandy said, her eyes twinkling. She was enjoying this a bit too much "But I'm not going to tell you."

  I started to protest, but Mandy simply dashed through the door to the RV's bedroom, calling over her shoulder to me as she shut the door to change.

  "Don't worry, it's fun," she said.

  I harumphed to myself, but decided that I was on vacation and should see this as a happy surprise. I sat on the little couch and waited for Mandy to come out. The RV was a comfortable place with a sofa that folded out to the bed Mandy and I would be sleeping on. There were also two tan recliners, each one claimed by one of Mandy's parents. The kitchen was a little galley style with appliances that seemed to be three-quarter sized. I'd never spent any considerable amount of time in an RV, so this inside look was intriguing to me.

  I peeked out the window again and looked at the sun room that had been added on. The idea of adding a permanent room onto a mobile home seemed a little silly at first, but most of the RVs down here had some sort of permanent structure added and it doubled the living space. Instead of having a dining table in the RV, there was a larger one out in the sunroom that could accommodate lots of guests. Against one wall was a bar with a full-sized refrigerator behind it. I had the feeling that the clubhouse for the Dolls extended into the sunroom. I was starting to think it would be pretty cool to have a clubhouse like this, but seeing as I was the girl living in her parent's library, I didn't have much say in any additional construction projects.

  "Your turn," Mandy said as she slammed the sliding door open. She came out in a dark heather green, high-waisted bikini. Somehow she managed to look amazing without looking like she was trying to dress like a teenager. I envied her natural sense of style.

  I grabbed my swimsuit and switched places with Mandy. After shutting the door, I turned around and looked at this half of the RV. Through the door was the bedroom and a small bathroom. Most of the bedroom was taken up by a large, queen size bed that was covered with throw pillows and a floral duvet. I assumed that the small cabinet on each side of the head of the bed held Bill and Sally's clothes.

  There were two more doors, one on each side of me, in what seemed to be the world's tiniest hallway. I opened the one on the left and a bunch of hanging clothes popped out. Okay, so it was a closet. I slowly closed the door as I shoved the clothes back in so I didn't shut anything in the door.

  The door on the other side was the world's smallest toilet room. I wondered if I was supposed to actually shut the door when I used it because it was so tiny. The sound of a bird chirp made me look up. The tiny room came with a tiny, covered skylight. I guess that's a nice addition.

  What caught my attention the most about this half of the RV was the shower. It was kind of an open-plan type shower. It was a shower stall, but it was just placed in the corner of the bedroom. There was a curtain you could draw around it if you wanted to. I guess when I need to shower, I'll have to tell everyon
e not to come back here. On the other hand, at least the shower wasn't in a tiny room like the toilet was. I knew I'd have enough claustrophobia just using the bathroom.

  "Are you dressed yet?" Mandy said, rapping impatiently on the plywood door.

  "Almost, just hold on," I yelled back. I hadn't even started getting changed yet.

  I quickly pulled off my clothes and pulled on the black, one-piece swimsuit that Mandy convinced me I should buy. I took a peek in the mirror hanging on the back of the toilet door and I had to admit that I looked good. Mandy was annoyingly dead-on with her fashion sense for both herself and for me. I made a mental note to listen to her more often when it comes to clothes.

  Mandy and I emerged from the sunroom onto the deck and were greeted by Sally and Bill, each holding two pool noodles. Each one was a different color with one of our names written on it. Mandy was handed the yellow noodle and mine was red. I looked from them to Mandy, still trying to figure out what in the world we were doing.

  "I'm just going to come out and ask," I said. "What in the world is bobbing?"

  "Oh dear, I suppose we didn't actually explain," Sally said. "Well all of us old people can't really swim, so what we do is bob. Everyone has a pool noodle and they use them to bob around the pool."

  "And as keeper of the pool, let me tell you the rule," Bob said. He puffed up his chest, obviously enjoying the prestige of being the leader. "Everyone must label their noodle with their name because we used to have problems with people leaving them behind. Every night when I close up the pool, I collect any pool noodles that have been left behind. If someone leaves their noodle behind three times, we fine them."

  "What else do you have to do as the keeper of the pool?" I asked.

  "Every night I have to make sure the pool is cleared out. We don't want anyone in there late at night when there won't be help available if they need it."

  "And how did you become the leader?" I asked.

  "I was appointed keeper of the pool by the Guys and Dolls," Bill said with a large smile on his face. "Now the Keeper says we should get a move on."

  We walked together down Santa Claus Street towards the massive Candy Cane Palace. A large concrete patio extended from the back of the building. One section was surrounded by a fence and bushes, hiding whatever was on the other side. I had to assume it must be the pool but judging by the size, the pool was probably more of an exaggerated hole in the ground filled with water.

  "There's the pool, girls," Bill said as he gestured towards the bushes, putting my curiosity at rest.

  Hidden between two bushes was a little gate that Bill unlatched and held open for us. Just as I suspected, the kidney shaped pool was not nearly as big as I assumed it would be. It was, however, just the right size for about twenty people at a time to float around on their pool noodles.

  "Hey-yo!" came the cheers from the pool. All of the Dolls were already there waiting for us. Each one had a husband with them and they all seemed to be matched sets. Susie's husband appeared to still lift weights everyday as he was impossibly buff for an older man. Marie's husband had at least four gold chain necklaces around his neck while she still wore her bangles and other jewelry in the pool. She wasn't the only one who kept her jewelry on because I spotted Susie's bicycle necklace also. Lynn's husband had a very full head of hair that was gelled up into a sky-high pompadour that almost rivaled Lynn's up-do. Louise's husband looked just a bit out of place, just like his wife usually did. His hair was styled in a well-done combover, which is to say he had enough hair to kind of pull it off, but it was still obvious that he was hiding a bald spot. And Kathy and Karen's husbands looked so much alike that I wondered if they were actually twins also. I made a mental note to ask Sally later, just for curiosity's sake.

  We found some empty pool chairs where we set our towels and stripped off the shorts we'd thrown over our swimsuits. Even though the pool was a bit small, there were plenty of chairs and I decided that I would come down here tomorrow with a book if I could find a small chunk of time in the busy schedule that Sally had put together for us.

  One end of the pool had a wide staircase leading down into the shallow end of the water. I assumed by the fact that everyone's hair was dry that jumping into the pool was a no-no. So Mandy and I grabbed our noodles and followed Bill and Sally down the stairs. The water was warm, almost like a bathtub. I chuckled to myself, thinking about how they probably heated the pool for those "cold" days which would be like a breath of summer back in Minnesota. Well no matter what, it felt good today.

  I watched Sally and mimicked how she used her noodle. She held each end in one hand and pushed the middle down, sitting in the middle almost like she was on a playground swing. That seemed to be a much more mature way of bobbing, considering I had been thinking I'd straddle it like I was riding a hobby horse.

  "Isn't this the life, girls?" Bill asked as he floated by us. "Soak it up because after a week we're putting you back on a plane to the North Pole!"

  We all chuckled and Mandy splashed a little water at her father who put up his hands to block the attack. We all laughed even harder as Bill lost his balance and tipped over backward, dunking himself into the water. I was laughing so hard my stomach hurt as Bill emerged from the depths of the pool with a giant smile on his face. Looking around, everyone was laughing so hard that I wondered if anyone else would dunk themselves.

  "Splashing is against the pool rules," came an acidic voice from the direction of the pool gate. "You'd think the daughter of the pool keeper would know that. I hope this isn't a case of special privileges for the golden child."

  The joyful atmosphere of the pool immediately sunk to the bottom as the laughter and smiles melted into looks of contempt. I turned around to see who this lovely sounding character was.

  Standing just inside the fence was a bitter looking old woman wearing a house dress with a large, loud floral pattern that contrasted with the expression on her face. Her silver hair was curled so tightly that it sat high above her head and then cascaded around her face and down to her shoulders in waves that were just a bit too tight to be fashionable.

  Behind her stood a woman who was so hunched over that she looked like she was almost going to get down and do a somersault. For a moment I felt bad, thinking she may have a hunchback. But another look told me she was just so deferential to the woman in front of her that she practically bowed to her constantly so as not to stand up taller than her.

  It didn't take a genius to figure out that we had just been introduced to Cindy Parker, the Poodle Woman and her lackey, Hilda Brown.

  Chapter Four

  "Hello there Cindy, Hilda," Bill said, ever the cheerful welcomer. "Come on into the pool with us. What can I do ya for today?"

  Bill's happy greeting only seemed to make Cindy more upset. I wasn't sure how Hilda felt because her face was turned down towards the ground and the top of her head didn't betray her feelings one way or the other.

  "First off, you know we don't go in the pool," Cindy said.

  "We know, Cindy," Louise said. "You wouldn't want to ruin that hair of yours."

  Cindy put one hand up to pat her hair, not seeming to understand the jab that went along with it. Hilda did, though because her head snapped up and her dark, beady eyes searched the pool, trying to figure out who had said it. I couldn't help but think that the task of picking out Cindy's attacker would be much easier if she had been looking up to actually see who had said the offending remark.

  "Of course I don't want to ruin this hair," Cindy said. "I spend hours on this hair each week. I'm not going to ruin it simply so I can float around this giant bathtub in everyone's germs. Besides, it probably isn't even clean."

  "Cindy, if you have a problem with the pool, you can take it up with me privately," Bill said. "I'm the keeper of the pool and I take my job quite seriously."

  "You only take it seriously because you like the power that comes with it," Cindy snapped. Hilda was standing behind her, vigorously nodding her head up
and down. "I wouldn't tell you the problems if you paid me. I go right to the top. I take all of my complaints straight to Tom Parks."

  "We know," came a chorus of voices from the pool. I looked around. Who in the world was Tom Parks?

  "Tom Parks owns the park," Sally said, sensing my confusion. "And yes, he realizes the correlation between his job and his last name."

  I nodded. We hadn't even been here for an entire day yet and already we were embroiled in the drama of the RV park. I was actually a little surprised that a retirement community could have so much drama. It was almost better than a reality TV show.

  "Well if you want to get anything done in this park, you have to go to the top," Cindy said, charging on in her speech. "It isn't like you lot do anything besides sit at that stupid clubhouse and eat and drink while you decide how to make everyone else feel unwelcome. And that wouldn't be so bad if you didn't constantly break the rules of the park."

  "Cindy, we don't really break the rules of the park," Bill said. "Besides, most of them are more like guidelines than anything else and the others are rules that are utterly pointless. Why should we have to limit the number of chairs on our deck? Does it matter if we have more than the allowed four chairs? We have a large deck and lots of friends. Are we supposed to only allow two of them to sit with us because of that rule?"

  The group in the pool quietly tittered with laughter while Cindy's snarl deepened. Her gnarled fists curled up into balls against her gaudy house dress. In that moment, I almost felt bad for her. Obviously this was a woman who had some sort of deep hurt somewhere and everyone laughing at her did not help.

  "It isn't about the chairs, Bill," Cindy bellowed, surprising me with her volume. The voice that came out was so mismatched from her that the laughter in the pool immediately stopped.